When I first started this, I had such high hopes I would blog twice a week. I had this idea that somehow I would blog more than twice a week. I would have several posts to choose from each time I attempted to post something. I was sure I would have so much to say that it would flow out of me. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As Lightning McQueen would say, \u201cThat did not happen.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
About 5 years ago, as part of team building at my job, we did a Myers-Briggs survey and bonding workshop for the staff. (I was labeled ENJT which pissed me off. I still think I am really an introvert pretending to be an extrovert.) One of the questions they asked during the workshop was, \u201cWhy do you come to work every day?\u201d My answer was, \u201cBecause I said I would.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I do things because I said I would. It doesn\u2019t matter if I may have been drinking before I said it. Once I say I will do something, I feel bound to do it. It is an obligation. It becomes a should.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
On the one hand it sounds great, right? I do the things I say I will do. I am reliable. I am dependable. I am also human and fallible; it is more accurate to say it is important to me to do the things I say I will do.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Digging a little deeper, the truth is when I don\u2019t do something I say I will do, my inner voice says I cannot do it at all. I lost my chance. I don\u2019t deserve to do it. My should becomes a can\u2019t.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Philosophically, this may be correct. In practice, it is stupid. The ability to react and replan and try again is a gift from our culture. Fall down, pick yourself up, and try again. This wasn\u2019t even a fall. It was a stumble. A hiccup. A blip. This is for me. There is no should in blogging. There is no one who has the ability to take away my blogging. There is no one who is affected if I don\u2019t do it twice a week. It is entirely up to me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Goals are good. Goals set signposts to let you know how you are doing. (Yay 5 million steps!) Goals sometimes get in the way. Did I really need a goal for this new hobby?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Saying I would post Tuesdays and Saturdays was a mistake. I mean, not just because I didn\u2019t maintain the cadence. It was supposed to be a reference to the song, \u201cSuite: Judy Blue Eyes.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n