{"id":511,"date":"2022-08-27T18:52:41","date_gmt":"2022-08-27T18:52:41","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lettersforzerrius.com\/?p=403"},"modified":"2022-08-27T18:52:41","modified_gmt":"2022-08-27T18:52:41","slug":"sometimes-im-wrong-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dynamic.lettersforzerrius.com\/2022\/08\/27\/sometimes-im-wrong-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Sometimes I\u2019m Wrong"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

That was a hard sentence to write. I mean, I can\u2019t complain but sometimes I still do1<\/a><\/sup>As Mr. Walsh pointed out to us<\/span>. I have had many successful moments in my personal life and in my professional life. Often I am right, so when I am wrong, it feels like a failure. And, since I try to be conservative in my actions2<\/a><\/sup>Managing resources to their best effect for me and my tribe<\/span>, I don\u2019t expect being wrong, because I like to think I am good at reading the room. So, it feels like a failure. It comes as a surprise. And yet, this week I had a major failure to understand the world view of my colleagues. It is bugging me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I wrote about associating qualities together that are not actually connected. I think my experience this week takes that a step further. You see, not only did I think everyone knew what the apples were3<\/a><\/sup>https:\/\/lettersforzerrius.com\/2022\/05\/22\/apples-to-apples-to-apples\/<\/a><\/span>, I thought everyone agreed they were a good thing. And we would treat the apples. And that was not at all true.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I have had these points in life, in my work life in my personal life, where it becomes obvious that I have been working under the wrong assumptions. I think this may be the case for everyone who has ever experienced the end of a relationship. For example, if Person A thinks everything is fine and the pair will work out their differences and Person B is making plans to move on but hasn\u2019t shared those plans yet, there will be a moment of shock.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There are a couple of amazing things about this that don\u2019t make my failure to understand that I and they were working at cross purposes easier, but perhaps they make how I am dealing with it easier to categorize my mistake. Perhaps it isn\u2019t so much a failure but a good revelation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

First \u2013 Maybe if I am not on the same page with you, I still want to stay on the page I am on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You see, I was working on the assumption that everyone believed the same things I do4<\/a><\/sup>So as not to vaguebook, I will say I thought we all agreed to be transparent with each other<\/span>. If the events of the past week had not happened, I would not be having a conversation with my direct leadership. For a while, I feared that I was wrong in how I assumed the system was supposed to work. I had to ask the question, \u201cAm I alone on this page?\u201d But that is good. If I know that I am wrong, I can reevaluate and make the decision: can I accept the new normal or not? You see, I realize, after all the conversations this week, I still have the power to make that decision for me even if I am alone on the page.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Second \u2013 Core Values are worth examining.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I think to have a core value, you have to question it from time to time to be sure it is still something you believe. Asking the question, \u201cDo I still believe this?\u201d needs to be done while accepting that the answer could be, \u201cNo.\u201d It is scary. It is hard. I have learned that my values do change and become refined as I see how they function in the wider world5<\/a><\/sup>Take the pandemic \u2013 PLEASE!<\/span>. Values are only tested when I interact with people who do and don\u2019t share the same values. When that happens, I take the opportunity to analyze \u2013 is this still what I believe? Or have I somehow shifted without realizing it?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Finally \u2013 It is ok to not want to change, but that doesn\u2019t mean your situation won\u2019t change.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This one is very scary. To me. I have been through a long thought exercise this week about what happens if where I am working believes my core value is crap. They might. I may be living my life as a Pollyanna<\/a> who believe people should treat each other with respect and we can make a better world. While I still cling to that Pollyanna view, I realize the truth is that my world view doesn\u2019t fit in very well with the business world. I have hope that we can all treat each other respectfully even if we disagree. Unfortunately, that may not be the case and I may have to just let that situation exist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It is so hard for me to not be respected by my colleagues and to watch them treat each other with a lack of respect by hiding information and trying to win instead of trying to get to a good place for everyone. Together.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The real point is, that I did fail to see the warning signs and I did fail to prevent a rather tense situation this week at work. I did get input that I am not alone. As they say at the climax in, The Last Unicorn, <\/em>\u201cHow does it end?\u201d Well, it doesn\u2019t. It is a nexus point, but not a destination. And I wouldn\u2019t have seen that if I hadn\u2019t realized I was wrong.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

That was a hard sentence to write. I mean, I can\u2019t complain but sometimes I still do. I have had […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dynamic.lettersforzerrius.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/511"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dynamic.lettersforzerrius.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dynamic.lettersforzerrius.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dynamic.lettersforzerrius.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dynamic.lettersforzerrius.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=511"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/dynamic.lettersforzerrius.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/511\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dynamic.lettersforzerrius.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=511"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dynamic.lettersforzerrius.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=511"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dynamic.lettersforzerrius.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=511"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}